Looking For Jesus
by No Fate 1990
Summary: Jennifer is experiencing a crisis of faith. Jen is the victim of domestic violence. Domestic violence kills her. Her kids, Callie and Jude are placed into foster care. While living with Stef and Lena, Callie reunites with Robert who dated Jen in highschool.
1. Looking For Jesus

Jen's p.o.v

I am looking for Jesus in the mist

of this hot mess, my so called life.

Mother Mary whispers he is here,

but I don't see him. Brutally shaken

and broken, I wander off. I take care of myself

until other wise. I am looking for Jesus in the

mist of this chaos, a health and faith crisis.

Surrendering remains a constant

struggle for me even in the end.


	2. You had me at zero chance

Callie's p.o.v

You had me at zero chance.

Blindsided by domestic violence,

you never once considered me.

I witnessed your abuse firsthand.

Slipping away, you loosened

my hand real fast. You had me at

goodbye, zero chance.


	3. Waltz of The Clumsy Ballerina

Situation: Jen has fallen down the stairs and suffered a miscarriage

Jen's p.o.v

A bunch of unnecessary drama and bad karma

Waltz of the clumsy ballerina

A private domestic dispute

This bloody miscarriage


	4. One beautiful disaster

Jude's p.o.v

One beautiful disaster

Consealed bumps and bruises underneath your mascara

Evanescent youth

A time of great travail

Numerous insecurities

Needless careless mistakes


	5. Never seen anything so cool and tragic

Jen's p.o.v

Speechless, Callie observes me putting on make up. "I have never seen anything so cool and

tragic" my teenage daughter analyzes. "What do you mean?" I wonder. "Your makeup covers

your scars" she points out. "I feel vulnerable and unattractive without makeup" I pout. "You are

smart and beautiful to me" Callie responds. Kind, she reminds me of her father and my former

highschool sweetheart, Robert Quinn that way. My abusive husband, Jude's father brings my

self esteem to an all time low. My Grandma comes and takes the kids away from the house.


	6. Dreading The Worst

Date: 7-13-2013

Amy Lindley's p.o.v (as a six year old)

"I miss mommy. Why can't I be with her?" I complain moping around Grandma's den. "Amy, you

will see your mother soon" Grandma assures me. "Probably at her funeral" Jude assumes.

"Jude, be quiet!" angry, Callie snaps back at him. "How can we sit here and do nothing while

mom is being abused!" Jude yells. Callie restrains him before he can run out of the house.

Grandma holds me tight and close. The front door opens and we embrace our mother whose

face is almost unrecognizable.


	7. Easily Bendable Heart

Jen's p.o.v

Slowly shutting down and slipping away from view

An easily bendable heart

Double-edged swords

Dangerous ill-fated stars

Random health and faith crisis

Eeerie all too well familiar feeling

A brutal rude awakening

My ascension


	8. Running Back and Forth

Callie's p.o.v

Running back and forth

Its only a matter of time before she's like the wind

They say they are her friends, but they are totally clueless

All signs of abuse are hidden well beneath her mascara


	9. Say What You Will Before Its Too Late

How could've I known? How could've I shown? Say what you will before it's too late. Say what you will -Damnhit Doyle, Say What You Will

* * *

Time Period: A Flashback

Year: 2007-A Time Shortly Before Amy's Birth

Jen's p.o.v

Ten year old Callie catches me preparing for the hospital. I have a feeling the baby may be

born tomorrow or the few next days. Gramps will drive me to the hospital whenever my labor starts.

Amy's father, Henry will meet us at the hospital. Depending on my recovery period, Gramps will

be able to handle Jude and Callie. "Mom, why are you packing a suitcase?" Callie asks

me in the present time. "The time is drawing close for Amy to be born" I stress rubbing my

big swollen stomach. "I heard you and Grandma discussing your heart condition. Your heart

condition sounds serious. I apologize for eavesdropping. I am really concern about you and

Amy. I fear losing you and her" emotional, Callie confesses. "I am not going to lie to you. My

heart is in very bad shape. This third pregnancy has been difficult. The doctor, your grandma,

and I have been looking out for any signs of trouble" I reconfirm.


	10. Rapid Chaos

Scenario: Jen's death

Callie's p.o.v

Rapid chaos

Evaporated false sense of security

A bloody red door into the great unknown

Her heart and body gave out at last

A ghost from the past carried her to heaven

Yahweh's silence bothered me

Doom and gloom followed me everywhere until I found a new home

Easier left unsaid and undone

Nighttime beyond these four walls


	11. Oldest Trick In The Book

Jude's p.o.v

They shuffle us around like a deck of cards

Its the oldest trick in the book

Complaining to get what I want

Its the oldest trick in the book

They promise to give us a home

Your love will always stay the same


	12. Reunion of a Lifetime

Callie's p.o.v

The greatest reunion of a lifetime

You and me

Linked together forever

Even if there are distractions

Reign over me, love


	13. Your Quiet Strength

Scenario: Robert has reunited with his birth daughter who is Callie

Robert's p.o.v

Your quiet strength

A matter of faith and trust

Waterfalls that you cry or try to avoid in secret

Not today or tomorrow will you receive justice

I promise to look after you

God knows how precious and beautiful you are to me

Hope can be found within your smiles and hugs


	14. A Wretched Deliverance

Time Period: A Flashback

Date: July 1997

Event: Callie's birth

Place: A Hospital Delivery Room

Jen (aggressively pushing and screaming): AHA..AHA..AHA

The doctor, Helen, and Jack aka Robert (cheering on Jen): Push, Jen, you can do this

Jen (still desperately trying to bring forth the baby): AHA..AHA..AHA

The doctor (places a crying baby girl in Jen's arms): You have a daughter

Jen (extremely exhausted but happy): Her name will be Callie. I shall raise her on my own.

Helen and Jack (alarmed): Jen, you are crazy!

Jen (yelling at Jack): You have lost my trust. You have kept too many secrets such as your real name from me. I never knew your real full name was Robert Jack Quinn Mcphee. Your sexual orientation has confused me as well. I never knew you were bisexual. Callie doesn't deserve a liar as a father.

Jack (disappointed, he leaves the room): I wish you good luck

Jen: Ok, whatever

Helen: Jennifer Lindley Ryan, that wasn't the nice Christian thing to do!

Jen (feeling somewhat guilty): I am sorry, gramps

Helen (embracing Jen): I forgive you

* * *

Time Period: A Flashback

Date: November 2000

Event: Jude's birth-A Home birth

Jen (crying and screaming from within the room): I can't do this

The midwife (comforting Jen): Just one more big push

Jude's dad (impatiently, he stands in the hallway with Helen and Callie (3 years old): Has she had that damn baby yet?

Helen: Childbirth takes time, my dear

Jude's dad: Sure

(After many hours of waiting, Jude is born at last. Jen, Helen, and Callie take great delight in him.)

* * *

Time Period:A Flashback

Year: 2007

Event: Amy's birth

Place: A Hospital Delivery Room

Jen (in the mist of giving birth, she starts hyperventilating): I can't breathe..it's my heart

Helen (yelling at the doctor and nurses): My granddaughter can't breathe. Somebody do something please!

(Accompanied by Helen, Jen is rushed off to the emergency room where Amy is delivered via an emergency cesarean section.)

* * *

Time Period: The Present Reality

Place: California- Jen's ashes' final resting place-The beach

Callie (crying, she starts walking away): I can't do this

Jude: Why have you given up so quickly?

Callie (livid): I hate your dad for killing mom

Jude: My dad has done his time in jail. He deserves your forgiveness.

Callie: He deserves nothing from me

Jude: Mom would've wanted you to move on.

Robert: Settle down, children

Callie (sobbing hard): Today is the third anniversary of my mother's death. I never told her goodbye.

Stef (embracing Callie): OH Love

Lena (releasing balloons to the sky): Happy Resurrection Day, Jen


	15. Hopelessly Wandering

Amy's p.o.v (as a nine years old girl living with different foster care parents)

I am hopelessly Wandering and wondering why?

Nearing a solution, I am looking forward to our reconciliation


	16. Amy's Crossing

Place: A Prison-Visiting Center

Scenario: Under strict supervision, Amy spends time with her birth father, Henry Parker. Henry dated Jen in highschool. He is in prison for selling and buying illegal drugs.

Henry (touching Amy's cheek): I have missed you, sweetheart

Amy (lying): I have missed you too

Henry: I miss the days when I was a free man

Amy (somewhat truthful): I wish we were a family again

Henry: You, me, and your mom would've had a blast

Amy (choked up): A broken heart killed her

Henry (choked up): I shared a cell with her ex-husband and killer. He bragged about the murder.

Amy (shocked): No way!

Henry: Unfortunately, it's true

Amy: How did you react?

Henry: I gave him a bloody nose and that was all. He was moved to a different cell.

Amy: I have half siblings. Their names are Jude and Callie. They are his children. I don't see them much. They live in a different foster home.

Henry: That's sad


	17. Your Kinsman Redeemer

Amy's p.o.v

Knowing how much I would need comfort after visiting Henry, Ms. Cecile who was my foster mom

treated me to a blizzard at Diary Queen. This blizzard was my treat for being a good little girl.

Cece loved me as if I was her own daughter. Recently, the doctor discovered blockage in a major

artery of Ms. Cecile's heart. Her faith and perseverance inspired me. I wanted to stay with her

forever. She helped me to reconnect with my siblings. Their foster moms, Stef and Lena offered

to take me in if her health declined.


	18. All For The Love of My Child

Time Period: A Flashback

Year: 2007

Special Event: Amy's birth

Scene 1: The Hospital Waiting Room

Helen (approaching Henry): Henry?!

Henry (choked up, he embraces Helen): Thanks for keeping me informed

Helen (loosening her grip on Henry): No problem. You are the baby's father afterall.

Henry: Has the baby been born yet? How is Jen doing?

Helen: Jen is recovering nicely. She had an emergency cesarean section. She was experiencing heart problems and shortness of breath. You have a beautiful daughter named Amy.

Henry (excited): Amy?! I must see her.

Helen (leading Henry to Jen's recovery room): Come with me

(Henry arrives at the room and notices Jen bonding with their newborn daughter. He falls in love with the both of them immediately. Helen enjoys watching Jen and Henry interact. Jen and Henry carry on with their secret love affair until the day Henry gets arrested for selling and buying drugs.)

* * *

Time Period: The Present Reality

Place: Prison

Scenario: Amy is visiting Henry again

Henry: How is Ms. Cecile's heart doing?

Amy: Cece's heart is doing great. The medicine has been helping her. Everything is back to normal.

Henry: I guess she will always be your foster mother

Amy: Definitely

Henry: If I wasn't in prison, I would've taken care of you

Amy: I am grateful that I can spend time with you right now

Henry: All for the love of my child

Amy: Sure

Henry: What are your plans for the rest of the day?

Amy: Stef and Lena have invited Cece and me to a party. I will get a chance to see Callie and Jude.

Henry: I am happy for you


	19. The Neverending Deep Sleep

Amy's p.o.v

The neverending deep sleep

A long extended vocation


	20. Slipped Away

Amy's p.o.v

Sadly but surely, she slipped away

The Lord carried her home as he promised

One last supper with me did her heart good briefly

Passing through like morning

A happy new beginning for us


	21. Cherishing All That Remains

Scenario: In the aftermath of Cecile's death, Amy is staying with The Fosters permanently

Callie's p.o.v

Cherishing all that remains

Hold onto your sorrow no more

Even if tomorrow is not what you expected

Cherishing all that remains

Keep me in your heart for a while


	22. All I ever wanted & needed was your love

Amy's p.o.v

All I ever wanted and needed was your love.

Your encouragement has enabled me to

climb and move mountains. I wish

you all the best and good things

that life has to offer. Fragile,

everyday is just too short.

I will never withheld

my support from you.


	23. Reaching For Hope Beyond The Damage

Jude's p.o.v

Reaching for hope beyond the damage

You are surely a diamond in the rough like me

A smile and hug from you are all that I need from you in this life


End file.
